I noticed she was very sluggish. She was having trouble fulfilling what was being asked, even small things. She would take what seemed like forever to do the simplest tasks, sometimes getting lost to the point where she would have to be saved.

I knew what was wrong. She was being overworked. Day after day she would have so many tasks going on all at the same time, juggling so much more than she could handle. But she continued to be pushed until she could not be pushed any further. Her productivity continued to decrease even though the workload not only continued, but also became more demanding.

Finally, I knew what needed to happen so I expressed to her that she really needed to shutdown for a bit and helped her to do so.

We all know how it is when we have been overworked, how hard it is to stop and unplug. It doesn’t happen right away. The mind and body still want to keep going. Things keep popping up to address that seem urgent in the moment, but really are not, so you just have to delete them from your mind … until that beautiful moment comes when you can finally rest and relax.

That is exactly what happened to her. I sat with her and watched and helped until she finally found her way to let it all go. I could almost hear her sigh of relief.

Turned out she really didn’t need much at all. It is amazing, really, how little it can take to restore only if we would give ourselves that privilege. Once she rested a bit, she woke up and was ready to get back at it … functioning her normal, productive way … feeling good about herself and her abilities to serve others.

Can you relate to this story? I certainly can!

The truth is, the “she” in this story is my computer! That is exactly what happened to my computer last night. We were both tired … ha ha. So as I laid down to do what I call a 15-minute power nap or the R & R Pose and I had my laptop beside me helping “her” to shut down, too. She was so lost with so many files, windows, and applications running that it took time for her to reboot. I had to force quit many applications before she could finally shut down and reset herself.

I feel like that sometimes don’t you, the need to reboot? Why do we push and push thinking there is no time to rest? We only become unproductive or at best less productive by doing so.

Let me tell you that by taking the time to rest and take care of ourselves afford us the ability to be more productive … always! And, we are less stressed, healthier, happier people … operating from a place of inspiration and joy.

So, I urge you, dear women of wonder, to reboot your operating system BEFORE you get lost in the shuffle of demands in your life.

If you have a “rebooting” story or thoughts to share, please do so in the comment section below.

And, by all means, if you need help in rebooting your operating system email me and I would be honored to assist you.

So, how are you … really?  Do you even know?

We are asked all the time how we are.  Most of the time we give a pat answer that we are fine.  We go from meeting to meeting, activity to activity, job to job, etc. often times stressed without realizing just how stressed we really are.

Honestly?  That is where I have found myself recently!

I have started The Wonder Woman Challenge fan page on facebook where a bunch of us have started a 30 day challenge together.  It has just started on Monday.  Even though we are only a couple of days into the challenge I am personally amazed with just how much pressure I have been putting on myself, ignoring what all is going on inside … in body, mind and spirit.

So, how are you … really?

When was the last time you checked in with yourself, when you stopped to get quiet long enough to get an answer back?  And when was the last time you asked yourself what you needed and actually gave it to yourself?

We get caught up in life with all of its ups and downs.  In doing so, we tend to ignore, deny, and even mask what is going on inside of us and unless we take the time to stop and listen, we end up in a numbed out state just going through the motions of life.  And I know from personal experience how that state can lead to depression and illness.

I ask you, where’s the joy in that?

So, how are you … really?  Are you living in joy?

I encourage you to stop right now and give yourself a check in.  How full is your cup?  Take some time now to fill that cup of yours up with love and joy.

I invite you to join us at The Wonder Woman Challenge fan page on Facebook for a 30-day challenge.  It’s only 15 minutes a day.  You’ll get support there as well and you’ll get to read my personal journal.

Love and hugs to you!!

Today is the day of love.

My dear women of wonder, today my heart is full of love and compassion for all of you.  On this day of love, I send you all the love that I can muster up because you are so worth loving.

The Wonder Woman Challenge has always been about stepping off of the merry-go-round of life a few minutes each day in order to love yourself … to fill your empty cup with love SO THAT you can joyfully give to those around you.  We must learn and practice giving from a full cup.

Today is the day of love.

Regardless of what anyone else does for you, what are YOU going to do for YOU?  Don’t miss this opportunity to express to yourself just how much you do care and love yourself.  Your spirit will leap with joy!

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” ~ I Corinthians 13:4-7

I encourage you to not only apply this passage of love to those around you, but also to yourself in a balanced and healthy manner.

Today is the day of love.

“What women need is to learn how to nurture themselves. We need to shower as much loving kindness on ourselves as we habitually shower on loved ones, and even not-so-loved ones. We need to be loved for our fully formed selves, not for our dependent, appeasing selves. And the only way we can have fully formed selves is by granting ourselves the same tenderness and fierce protectiveness we’d otherwise reserve for a beloved child.” ~ Alice D. Domar, PhD “Self-Nurture”

I love you!

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Shileen

Taking Valentine’s Day into your own hands is a great thing to do!  Why wait and hope that someone will recognize you on Valentine’s Day when it isn’t necessary?

Valentine’s Day can be a fun holiday, it can be a bummer of a holiday.  As women, we always hope that our loved ones will recognize their love for us on this day.  The waiting can be unnerving … will he/they do something or won’t they?  Will someone think of me?

Let me ask you… who really needs that?? I sure don’t!

Many years ago I decided to take Valentine’s Day into my own hands making it whatever I wanted it to be.  I thought about what would bring me great joy on this day.  How can I express love to those close to me that would also fill my own love tank?

I started by giving a tea party to my family, which consists of two boys and a hubby.  You are probably wondering how I pulled that off.  Although at the time they would not admit it, they all loved it!  It was food!  Tell me what boy or man who does not like food!!  =)  Plus they knew it was important to me and we always enjoyed conversation around family time (we still do).  Our tea parties over the years have always been very lovely and meaningful.

It has been a few years since I have thrown a Valentine Tea party.  I will always recognize my guys on this day and they typically do me as well, but I seriously count their recognition as a bonus.

Listen, it is just as important to love on ourselves as it is to love on others.  When we love on ourselves it frees others to love on us.  While you are recognizing your loved ones on Valentine’s Day, what can you do to recognize yourself?  Plan a special tea for yourself, a bubble bath, buy yourself some flowers, take some time to work on a hobby, etc.  Think of a way to treat yourself special, something that will bring you joy.

Here’s a fun idea!  While I was putting together a gift for a friend, I put one together for myself as well.  I love it!  It is simple.  I always say it is the simple things of life that bring me the most joy!

I made a cute set of Valentine’s Day coasters, bought a new mug (I am a sucker for a cute mug!), made up some of “My Famous Hot Chocolate Mix”, and added some of my favorite tea.  It is so very cute!  Just looking it at fills me with joy!

The coaster idea came from one of my favorite websites Cupcakes and Crinoline in an article called Sew Happy 30 Minute Coasters.

Taking Valentine’s Day into your own hands is a great thing to do.  In the end everyone feels blessed with a full love tank.

Do you have any Valentine’s Day ideas to share?

So you want to indulge in a treat … after all, this is the time of year where there are sweets and treats around every corner.  This is also the time of the year when stress is higher than normal as discussed in my last article, “Avoid the Holiday Meltdowns”.  With stress often comes over eating and/or binge eating.

I want to share a little trick I use to help curtail this kind of binge eating.  Keep in mind that this “trick” I use does not address the root problem.  That will be saved for another article.  This really isn’t even a trick at all but more of a special treatment.

What I want to share with you today allows you to indulge in a healthier way that, if done properly with the right mindset, can actually be a self-care activity. It’s very simple and fun.

Decide on a treat that you really want.  Don’t be mindless about it.  For example I made Pumpkin Cream Cupcakes the other night.  Oh my goodness!  They are so good! (I’ve included the recipe below.) They remind me of the Pumpkin Cream Cheese Muffins from Starbucks, which I love.  I could easily eat several in one setting if I’m not careful, so to avoid that kind of a binge eating I create “a moment”.

As you can see in the picture above, I created a beautiful holiday setting for eating one (not two, three or even four!) Pumpkin Cream Cupcake. I watched a holiday movie in this setting but sometimes I will play soothing music or sneak away to a quiet place in the house.

A very important aspect of this activity is to be in the moment and use your five senses while indulging in the treat.  Talk about an enjoyable stress reliever!  It feels very special because it is!  It sends a very nurturing message to yourself that you care enough to not binge on your favorite treat while meeting your need to de-stress in a more delightful healthier way.

The next time you feel a binge coming on due to stress or any other reason, allow yourself to indulge in a small treat if you like but create a special moment that tickles your senses.  You will be quite surprised with the results!

Pumkin Cream Cupcakes

From Food & Family Kraft Magazine

www.kraftfoods.com

1 pkg (2-layer size) spice cake mix

1 pkg (3/4 0z) Jell-O Vanilla Instant Pudding

1 cup canned pumpkin

1 pkg (8 oz.) Philadelphia Cream Cheese, softened

1/4 cup sugar

1 egg

Heat oven to 350 degrees.

Prepare cake batter as directed on package.  Add dry pudding mix and and pumpkin; mix well.  Spoon into 24 paper-lined muffin cups.

Beat cream cheese with mixer until cream.  Blend in sugar and egg; spoon over batter.  Swirl gently with small spoon.

Bake 18 to 21 minutes or until toothpick inserted in centers comes out clean.  Cool 5 minutes; remove to wire racks.  Cool Completely.

Special Extra:  Stir 1/4 tsp ground nutmeg into 1 1/2 cups thawed Cool Whip; spread over cooled cupcakes.  Keep refrigerated.

There’s a lot going on at this time of the year as we get ready for Christmas.  Stress is at an all time high … wouldn’t you say?  Life is crazy enough but then when you add the holiday “stuff” on top of an already busy schedule?  It spells … m-e-l-t-d-o-w-n!

Ok, girlfriends, how do we avoid the holiday meltdowns this year?!

First of all, stop wherever you are in your holiday preparations and celebrations and think about what you want Christmas to be for you and your family.  Certainly you don’t want it to be all about stress and meltdowns.  I know that my family does not want me to be irritable, resentful, and miserable during a time that is supposed to be about family, love, and celebrations. They told me so many years ago.  It was then that I began to scale down and slow down so that I could enjoy the beautiful season that it is.

Forget the picture perfect Christmas.  Choose one or two things that are most important and focus on those things.  Do you really need a million different kinds of homemade cookies?  No!  Does your house need to look like something out of a magazine?  No! Seriously, keep it all simple so that you can devote the time you do have to those you love in a way that will create beautiful, fun memories.

That takes me to you.  You know how it goes … “If mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!”  Let’s keep mama happy during this holiday season.  What do you need to do to make that happen?

Yes, scale down the preparations and celebrations.  But also keep up with your self-care activities.  You only need 15 minutes a day – that alone makes such a big difference.  But ya know what? If you need to shut the world out for a while, do so.  Watch your favorite movie, read a book, take a long nap, a bubble bath or whatever you need to do to restore.  These little things make all the difference in the world!

Avoid the holiday meltdowns this year by simplifying and taking a little time to de-stress.  It’s the best Christmas gift you can give to your family and yourself!

Do share your own thoughts and ideas in the comment section below.

In honor of breast cancer awareness month, I encourage you to honor your breasts.

I am forever encouraging people to listen to their bodies and honor their bodies by giving them what they need.  Well what about our breasts?  I know. You get your yearly breast exam by your doctor.  You give yourself a monthly breast self-exam, right?  More than likely you do not because not many women do.  Why?

Dr. Christiane Northrup in “Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom” says the following:

“Women’s reluctance (even female nurses and doctors who are supposed to know better) to do breast self-exams is rooted in two things:

1. Fear about what you’re going to find

2. Innate inner guidance that knows that making a breast exam into a ‘search and destroy’ mission is not only counterproductive, it may even be harmful.

By the law of attraction, that which we focus on tends to expand.  So who in their right mind would consciously approach their breasts every month thinking, ‘cancer’?”

Ok, let’s have an honest moment.  Seriously, are you afraid to touch your breasts for fear of what you might find? Some women don’t even want to look at their breasts.  And for some it’s possible to carry emotionally charged issues, like shame, that contributes to ignoring this part of the body.  With that, it’s time to let go!

Ladies, I encourage you to honor your breasts and by doing so you will set into motion a sense of freedom and promote healthy breasts.

Below are a few steps you can take to begin to honor your breasts:

1. Give your breasts positive energy.  Notice what your self-talk is around this area of your body.  Is it negative, berating, neglect?  Notice and if it’s anything but positive, stop, and then change the negative into something positive.

2. Look at your breasts.  It’s ok! And be kind to them.

3. Touch them!  Again, it’s ok!  In a loving way become familiar with your own breasts.

4. I highly encourage you to understand your breasts and learn a lymphatic massage that will promote healthy breasts.  It will send  healing and positive energy to them.  Click on the following link:

Self Care For Your Breasts

As Christiane Northrup said, “By the Law of attraction, that which we focus on tends to expand.”  Because of that I prefer to focus on breast health rather than breast cancer.  I don’t check my breasts each month for cancer rather each time I shower I honor my breasts by performing a self-care breast massage described at the above website.

Because of this massage technique, I am very familiar with my breasts and I’m able to notice if there are any kind of changes.  I also send positive energy, thoughts, and love to that area of my body, which promotes healthy breasts.  You can too!

Beautiful woman, I encourage you to honor your breasts!

Please leave your thoughts and comments below.

Here I sit in the middle of Starbucks sipping my favorite latte, listening to beautiful music … just being … allowing thoughts to come and go … mostly go as I release them onto the pages of my journal.

Release. It’s so important to release the pressures of life. We need to release the stress, the tensions, the worries that tend to build up inside of us. Yes, unless we have a way to let it all go, to release, the “stuff” gets stuck in our bodies causing all kinds of havoc.

Right now, my dear reader, stop. Take a minute or two right now and just stop what you’re doing. Get quiet, close your eyes, and take a deep breath. Check in with yourself. Go inside and ask yourself how you’re doing right now in the moment.

What’s the very first answer that comes to your mind? Don’t judge it, accept it whatever it is.

Got your answer? Ok, here we go again. Ready? Take another deep breath. This time ask yourself right now, in the moment… “What do I need?” What’s the very first answer that comes to your mind? Don’t judge it, accept it whatever it is.

With your eyes still closed take another deep breath and just be. Revel in the moment of being.

Release. It’s so important to release the pressures of life.

Now, I challenge you to do whatever it is your body is telling you it needs. Honor yourself, love yourself, give yourself the tender loving care that you so deserve.

Below is a 5 – 10 minute yoga routine that I do daily. It’s a simple, quick way to release the pressures of life. Once you learn this simple routine you can practice it in quietness if you like or set it to relaxing music. For me, it releases the pressures of life, gives me energy yet relaxes me, and it puts a bounce in my step. It’s been known to give me warm fuzzies even! Really! ☺

Give it a try and let me know how it makes you feel.  Remember, take the time to release the pressures of life.  The results will amaze you.

With the right mindset you can turn many everyday activities into a self-care, self-nurturing moment.  All you have to do is learn “being in the moment”.

With a crazy, hectic life “being in the moment” can be quite the challenge.  With taking care of the kids, the house, work, family, etc. we end up running in a thousand different directions leaving our cup not just empty but dry to the bone, and sometimes even cracked.  For some, the thought of adding one more thing to the schedule, like The Wonder Woman Challenge, can send them right over the edge.

How can you make yourself a priority, to express love to yourself, to fill your cup without turning it into a big deal and sending you over the edge?  After all, the point of such activities is to be nurturing and filling to the soul.  Again, the answer is “being in the moment”.  Let’s explore that.

“Being in the moment” is consciously being aware of what you are doing as you are doing it.  It’s being present.  I tell my coaching clients all the time to “notice” because we tend to go through our days mindlessly and often hurried, which means we miss out on so much in our lives.  We also miss the cues our bodies, minds, and souls give us.

If you stop long enough to listen, “being in the moment”, you will not only learn about yourself, but when you are filling your cup you’ll hear and feel the appreciation and love that will exude from within.  Sometimes a little bit of self-care combined with seriously “being in the moment” will cause an emotional reaction.  It’s like receiving a long in coming hug from a loved one.  Let me give you an example.

I practice Mary Kay’s Timewise Skin Care regimen every morning and evening.  It’sdefinitely easy to get into a mindless mindset doing a daily activity like that.  And before bed it’s also easy to moan and complain about the routine because of being so tired even though it only takes a couple of minutes.

Instead, I choose “being in the moment”.  I think about what I’m doing, why I’m doing it, what message it’s giving me, and how good it feels.  I think about the fact that I am worth taking care of.  While doing so I notice my thoughts.  While I refuse negative thoughts I will sometimes take note of them if it’s something that needs explored and healed.  Otherwise, out it goes and it’s replaced with something positive and loving.

“Being in the moment” is that simple.  It’s forgetting the schedule, the stress, the craziness and allowing yourself to just be … to be present in that very moment and noticing your thoughts and feelings and being good to yourself.

Changing your mindset to “being in the moment” can definitely turn any simple daily activity into a self-care, self-nurturing moment filling your cup with love, enabling you to freely give to those around you from a point of strength and abundance.

In my coaching appointments probably the number one question I get is “How do I love myself?” or a statement of, “I don’t know what taking care of myself should look like for me”.

I almost always follow up with … “Well what brings you joy?”

Sometimes the person can rattle off a few things but often she doesn’t have a clue.  When you’re used to focusing on everyone and everything else and not care for any of your own needs, you tend to lose yourself.

I ask you, “What brings you joy?”

If you aren’t able to answer that question adequately then it’s time to ponder this question.  It’s time to look within and connect with who you are.  I can hear you asking … “How”?

For some, getting still and quiet and having what I call an honest moment with yourself can stir up some ideas.  You might be able to remember things that you used to do that you enjoyed or things that you always wanted to do or even some things you’ve put on the back burner.  Now is the time to explore those things.

If nothing comes to mind then you will have to start exploring the world around you.  The universe is our playground.  Don’t be afraid to explore it in a way that is not threatening to you and without judgment of yourself.  Just have fun going deeper with the things you find that you like and dropping the things you don’t like.

I was telling a friend today the first thing I did when I began self-care activities.  I took a book and journal to Starbucks.  This was before there were Starbucks on every corner so it was a bigger deal, however, I still love to go to Starbucks! ☺  Anyway, I spent time sipping my favorite latte with pen and paper in hand.  It was heaven.  Then I would go browse a favorite store.  I rarely bought anything; I just loved the ambiance of this one particular store.  It made me feel really good being there and I enjoyed nosing around.  Afterwards I felt like a million bucks!

But here’s the key.  You have to be in the moment.  Most of my activities are all very simple but to get the full benefit you have to be in the moment blocking out your to do list, the argument you had with hubby, the kids, etc. and then soak up the moment you are in with total gratitude appreciating yourself and God if He is a part of your life.  When you get “being in the moment” down, you can turn almost anything you do into a self-care, self-nurturing activity making the 15-minute daily commentment with TWWC very easy.

So I ask you, my dear?  What brings you joy?  Please do share in the comment section below.  If you don’t know then share that and/or what you think might bring you joy.  It’s ok.  Dream a little!

In my next post I’ll share more of my own personal self-care activities … how I can turn simple every day things into special moments.